A new leaf

I have recently decided to turn over a new leaf, I have made many promises to myself as well as others in the past year or so only to never really see them through. It's time for a change this time, they say you never know what you had until it's gone. Well that couldn't be more truthful, mistakes were made recently that should not have been. You never deserved that, and I know i have apologized to you time and time again, but the truth is that I never want to hurt you like that ever again. You deserve the world, and you mean the world to me. You have never once ever given me a reason to not trust you, you are the center of my universe. I love you to death and know for a fact you feel the same way about me and would never ever in a million years do anything to jeopardize that weather you were drunk or sober, it just could not and would not happen. From this day forth I make a REAL promise to try a lot harder than I have been in these regards. It is going to be a difficult task for me, and wont happen over night. But in my heart I know that i can over come this stupid issue for the both of us! I Love you so much Amanda Lynne Retes, please don't ever leave me ever, you are my world and it would come crashing down without you. again I love You to death stay with me forever!

Never

ceases to amaze me the stupid shit that causes problems. Im so sick of the dumb little things that cause problems. I have nothing but things to complain about when I get bored. I think this distance is just taking its toll on me, but im not going to give up, not ever. This means to much to me to just let it crumble beneath my feet. I need my little vacation coming up soon, more than anyone could possibly know. Its always better when Im with you, just hurry up and finish school so I can be with you forever.

Fuck you!

Your work ethic sucks, you do what you want when you want. You're a fucking scum bag asshole. I am no longer covering for your ass you pathetic excuse for a fucking human being, you don't deserve to work where you do, you take advantage of way to much. I hope you fucking get fired because that's about all you deserve. I did the entirety of your work day in 2 hours flat yesterday.. explain that you fucking faggot. fuck you, don't you dare fucking boss me around like you're the fucking king.

Every day..

I get more and more excited about getting married. Part of me thinks this is just weird behavior for a 22 year old man, but.. then on the other hand I'm happy and I could give a fuck what anyone else thinks.

Cool day

SO I started off my day by falling on my ass down a flight of wooden stairs. Then on my way in I get pulled over by a cop, because apparently I was going 40 in a 25.. and thats not even possibe considering the weather conditions. Thankfully he gave me a warning. Then Im here all day at work bored... and i have to work till 6PM tonight. not happy about that. so i have had a 12 hour day so far... and nothing good has come of it. on top of all that i cant even see my wife to be because we live nowhere near each other...

Day 1

That was a refreshing surprise visit. It was much needed, I miss you so much. I had a blast for the couple days I got. It was 100% worth it.. You're forever my queen and you deserve nothing but the world. I only hope I can give you everything that you deserve!! I love you.

Last night

I decided it was a good idea to drown my sorrows in a drink or 7. It actually made me express a lot of the feeling I had bottled up inside, and made things a lot better for me in more than one way. so I think things are going to start looking up from here on out!! (L)